1. You use way more tejföl (sourcream) than ketchup, mustard or other condiments. You pour a thick layer on all kinds of food, let it be sweet or savoury. Crêpes, chicken paprikash and even pasta will all get covered until unrecognisable. After all, tejföl makes everything better in life, doesn’t it?

2. Paprika has a special space both in your heart and on your dining table. You sprinkle it abundantly on every dish like there was no tomorrow. The hotter, the better! You also like to challenge your foreign friends on what level of spiciness they can still tolerate. Then you sit around the whole evening with a smug smirk and a burning mouth – but at least you have won, again.

3. You can curse for 5 minutes nonstop without taking a breath or using the same word twice. It is not uncommon to hear half a dozen of curse words in one sentence, especially when talking about politics or hurling insults at other drivers. Hungarian is a rich, colorful language and the locals’ humour and creativity really shine through when it comes to swearing.

4. The train has not even left the platform but you are already stuffing yourself with your first sandwich, which usually contains a slice of paprika or tomato and the quintessential salami or paprika sausage. Several days before the journey, you carefully calculate the number of sandwiches you have to prepare for the trip, no matter if it is just a 2-hour ride. You do not even dare to think about the horrors of going into a calorie deficit.

5. You swear that pálinka can cure any illness from an upset stomach to the common flu. After all, pálinka, especially the one mixed with honey, tastes better than any pharmacy-bought cough syrup. Even babies sleep better if you add a few drops of pálinka to their nursing bottles. We venture even further and say: you can practically exorcise evil spirits with some good old homemade pálinka.

6. You are a champion complainer. You are ready to vent about the weather, your neighbours, your most hated political party, the food or your loved ones for a solid 30 minutes as a response to a simple “how are you?”. Moaning, grumbling and lamenting is just part of your national identity – what’s wrong with that?

7. You make a sport out of blowing your nose loudly in public. The more it sounds like a trumpet, the more thorough job you did. You put a real effort into the act and do not tire until all the ‘content’ is gone. When you were little, your parents probably sent you to school each day with a meticulously ironed, embroidered handkerchief.

8. You were told to eat lots of carrots when you were a kid so you would learn how to whistle. If you are well in your 30s and still can’t utter a single tune no matter how hard to pucker your lips and try to produce a tone, it must be your fault as you probably did not listen to your parents well enough.

9. You call a 79-kilometre-long lake the Hungarian Sea. No Mediterranean or Caribbean vacation can beat your nostalgic childhood memories from Lake Balaton. Even if the water was shallow and muddy and you were often scared to step on the shells of the freshwater snails, you will always remember fondly the jolly good times you had at the Hungarian Sea.

10. You have an obsessive love for onion and garlic. Basically, 90% of Hungarian recipes start with the instruction: take a large onion and 2 cloves of garlic. However, Hungarians do not like to risk letting their loved ones down and serving them something tasteless, so they usually double the portion. Despite that, we are great kissers – no wonder after all that spicy paprika in our food.

+1 You throw a big do at your place and when your foreign friends wish you a happy birthday, you just shrug “oh, it’s my nameday actually, but cheers!!”, leaving them baffled about what the hell you meant by a nameday.