Budapest Post

Cum Deo pro Patria et Libertate
Budapest, Europe and world news

Six things almost every parent does that set kids up for financial misery

Parents may hate talking to their kids about money but that could be setting them up for future failure.

No one is born knowing how to handle money.

Smart money management has to be taught.

Guess whose job that is? That’s right: parents.

Yet teaching their kids about money is something most parents dread.

Instead, they’d rather go to the dentist (39%), talk about sex (36%) or pay a speeding ticket (6%). That’s according to a survey from Country Financial, which asked 1,021 adults in August about their feelings around parenting and personal finance.

Bottom of the list is talking to their kids about money.

Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed said parents are key in shaping how people first learn to manage money, but parents themselves admit they don’t have the best grip on their own finances. Almost half (46%) gave themselves a grade of C or lower when it comes to financial literacy.

Brad Klontz, author of “Mind Over Money” and co-founder of the Financial Psychology Institute, recommends people identify their money beliefs and take a close look at their family’s money story.

Cultural events can have a huge impact on people’s relationship with money, Klontz says. The Great Depression created a generation of savers, hoarders and even some who mistrusted financial institutions because of the failures of the banking system.

Many parents are generally reluctant to talk about money with their kids, says Thomas Henske, a certified financial planner and partner at Lenox Advisors in New York. They may not want to answer questions like, “Are we rich?”

“That’s such a good conversation starter, ” he said. And it doesn’t have to be directly answered if you don’t want to.

“Answer with a question,” Henske said. “Rich means different things to different people.

“What do you mean by rich?” he added. “Can you be rich in other ways?”

Henske didn’t feel ready to reveal his net worth to his children when they asked about it at dinner, so he turned the exchange into a conversation about what they thought the figure was — “They gave horrendous answers,” he said — along with the value of their house and their mortgage.

“We’re struggling with the mindset we need to take care of ourselves financially,” Klontz said. “We haven’t really gotten the memo as a culture, and we’re not teaching our kids that this is the new reality.”

Here are six classic parental missteps around money.


1. Always saying yes

“Parents sometimes sacrifice too much for their kids,” said Liz Gendreau, who blogs about family finance on her website, Chief Mom Officer. Gendreau has three sons ages 16, 12 and 4 .

Gendreau believes it’s a mistake to give kids everything, especially if it comes at the cost of saving for a parent’s own retirement. Whether it’s expensive college tuition or a lot of after-school activities, parents should balance their own financial needs with those of their kids.

Everyone has to make decisions about houses, cars, vacations and education, Gendreau says. “Help kids talk about alternative options,” she said. “Sometimes they have no idea what things cost.”

“It may not be something they want to hear, but you have to make choices with your money,” Gendreau said.

People commonly confuse loving with giving. The amount of time you spend with someone is more meaningful. “That is finite, and it’s the ultimate currency,” Henske said.


2. Buying things right away

Young kids need to learn the difference between a need and a want.

“They’re in a store, they want something, you say no, and they get into a hissy,” Henske said.

Instead, teach them strategies and have discussions around how much they want something.

When Henske’s own kids were small, he used to have them put things on their list. He recommends starting this strategy at age 5 or 6.

Older kids can write down what they want in a notebook. Younger kids can, with your help, print out a picture online of the desired object.

Two days later, they may find they no longer want it, Henske says.


3. Not teaching the basics

What’s credit, what’s debt, what’s the difference? “It’s really important to sit down with your kids if they’re still young or even have a conversation with a young adult, and really teach them about the dangers of using credit cards,” Klontz said.

People don’t understand how credit works. “You’re actually taking a loan from a bank at a very high interest rate,” Klontz said.

Debit cards work on money that is yours. When you use the card, you’re subtracting money from your own account.

Kids who don’t understand how credit works can face financial disaster when they first sign up for a card, which may be in college, Henske says.


4. Excluding kids from big decisions

If kids aren’t part of the process when a family buys a car or plans a vacation, they miss out on some important money lessons, Henske says. That means a lost opportunity to teach them the value of a dollar, since they rarely understand how much big things cost.

They might think it would be cool to buy a Maserati, but they have no idea of the dollar amount.

The danger is that, later on, they won’t have all the tools to make informed decisions around what college to go to and what careers they might like. “They don’t understand the income and lifestyle that a specific income affords you,” Henske said.

Vacation planning is perhaps more fun than talking about car alternatives and dealer negotiations. “Talk about the airfare, whether you’ll drive or fly, how much are meals,” Henske said.

This is a conversation that can go on for days, and kids can help with ideas for meals and recreation.


5. Paying for everything

Henske recommends always letting kids contribute something financially.

High school students might pay for their own car insurance. If someone wants an expensive iPhone, they might pay for the data service portion of the bill. “It doesn’t have to be an unworkable amount,” Henske said.

When his son wanted to go to a private school, Henske came up with a dollar amount that he could contribute. “It’s not huge, but he has to go out and referee games, work at an ice cream place,” Henske said. “It shows me he really wants to go.”


6. Treating money as a taboo

Not talking about money is like not talking about sex, Henske says. Just as most parents have some kind of conversation about intimacy so their kids go out into the world prepared, he recommends talking about money openly, too.

“We still treat personal finance and money as a kind of taboo,” Gendreau said.

She’s not recommending deep financial conversations with preschoolers, but by the time kids are in their teens, parents can talk about college costs or buying a car.

“They benefit from learning how to budget,” Gendreau said. “The more you can educate your kids through real-life examples, even things you wish you’d done differently, the better.”

AI Disclaimer: An advanced artificial intelligence (AI) system generated the content of this page on its own. This innovative technology conducts extensive research from a variety of reliable sources, performs rigorous fact-checking and verification, cleans up and balances biased or manipulated content, and presents a minimal factual summary that is just enough yet essential for you to function as an informed and educated citizen. Please keep in mind, however, that this system is an evolving technology, and as a result, the article may contain accidental inaccuracies or errors. We urge you to help us improve our site by reporting any inaccuracies you find using the "Contact Us" link at the bottom of this page. Your helpful feedback helps us improve our system and deliver more precise content. When you find an article of interest here, please look for the full and extensive coverage of this topic in traditional news sources, as they are written by professional journalists that we try to support, not replace. We appreciate your understanding and assistance.
Newsletter

Related Articles

0:00
0:00
Close
Miliband Sets Climate and International Law at Centre of UK Diplomacy
Czech Central Bank Governor Rejects Early Euro Entry and Rate-Cut Pressure
Trump Readies New Tariffs as Temporary Global Levy Nears Expiry
Vivienne Westwood Casts Cicciolina, 74, in Its New Autumn Campaign
Dejavu: Germany’s Military Expansion Reshapes Europe’s Strategic Balance With France
Morgan Stanley Builds a Wall Street Lead in AI Infrastructure Finance
High Prices Push Coffee Drinkers Toward Whole Beans and Home Brewing
Trump Draws Boos and Podium Scrutiny at Spain’s World Cup Triumph
Brilliant move: Péter Magyar Moves to Nominate Chess Grandmaster Judit Polgár as Hungary’s President
Spain Defeats Argentina in Extra Time to Win Second World Cup
Current AI Seeks to Build an Open Global AI Infrastructure Outside Big Tech Control
Germany’s Economic Malaise Reopens the Sunday Shopping Debate
Proposed U.S.-Saudi Nuclear Pact Could Permit Limited Uranium Enrichment Under International Safeguards
Netherlands Declares Water Shortage Emergency After Drought Pushes Rivers to Historic Lows
Why Kentucky Fried Chicken Became KFC—and Why the False Explanations Persist
Ukrainian Drones Strike Wildberries Warehouses Deep Inside Russia
Reported CIA Mission Helped Clear the UAE’s Path to Advanced US AI Chips
Artificial Intelligence Capital Fuels Markets While Governments and Regulators Face Mounting Strategic Tests
China’s Moonshot’s Kimi K3 Narrows the Gap With Anthropic Through Scale, Openness and Lower Cost
The Ledger Will Not Trust on Faith
Trump Administration Pressures Banks to Restrict Financial Access for Undocumented Immigrants
Passenger Bound for Germany Refused to Sit Beside a Woman on a Plane — Then Slapped a Flight Attendant
Ukraine’s Leadership Rift Spills Into the Streets as Protesters Target Army Chief
Ukrainian Drone Barrage Kills Eight and Strikes Russian Logistics Network
The Ten World Cup Finals That Defined Football History
Smartphones Are Getting More Expensive, Sales Are Collapsing, and Even Apple Admits: "Prices Will Rise"
The Monaco Bombing Has Become a Test of Ukraine’s Intelligence Accountability
Leadership Change and Strategic Rivalry Redraw the Political Map
The AI Race Enters Its Infrastructure Era
Britain Nationalises British Steel to Protect Scunthorpe Production and Strategic Supply
French National Assembly Overrides Senate to Pass Historic Assisted-Dying Legislation
Spanish Prime Minister's Wife Ordered to Stand Trial as Corruption Probes Encircle Governing Party
Zelensky Faces Kyiv Protests Over Ousting of Dynamic Ukrainian Defense Minister
Thomas Tuchel Faces Fierce Backlash After Tactical Retreat Costs England World Cup Final Berth
A Quiet Bastille Day: France Grapples with World Cup Heartbreak and Leftover Fireworks
Spain in Ecstasy: "We Feel Unbeatable, We Taught the Whole World a Lesson"
Spain and UK Dismantle Gibraltar Border Following Landmark Schengen Integration Treaty
Hungary's "Puppet" President to Be Ousted, Orbán Fumes: "Democracy Is Dead"
Forget Tinder: The Surprising Platform Where People Find Love
Harvard Astrophysicist to Lead U.S. Scientific Advisory on Unidentified Aerial Phenomena
Emergency Sirens Activated Across Bahrain as Interior Ministry Issues Shelter Directives
World Cup Visitors Turn American Big-Box Stores Into Souvenir Stops
Netflix Weighs Always-On Channels, Bundles and Short-Form Video
Passenger Is Pulled Partly Outside Ryanair Jet After Window Fails Mid-Flight
The AI Invoice Shock: Layoffs Didn't Save Managers Money — They Cost Them More
Concern: Sexually Transmitted Bacterium Among Men Develops Antibiotic Resistance
Passenger Partially Pulled Out of Ryanair Jet After Cabin Window Fails Mid-Flight
Severe Heatwave Drives Dangerous Ground-Level Ozone Pollution Across Two Thirds of European Union
The Physical and Electronic Barriers Disrupting Domestic Wireless Networks
France and Morocco Open World Cup Quarter-Finals as Collina Defends Refereeing
×